May. 17th, 2007


May. 17th, 2007 08:29 pm
I have many ideas that I want to make, however I don't ever quite seem to get around to doing them. I think I know why now.

It's because I feel like I'm wasting the fabric by making them for the size I am now. If I was a smaller girl that didn't seem to instantly rumple and deform everything I wear, I'd feel less like it was going to waste. It's never been a conscious thought in my mind, until I tried to think about why I can't seem to get anything done.

I've been out of the house for a fun thing (something other than work or medical) twice in the last several months. 3 times if you count yesterday. Between Mega and JACON, I went to the MC Chris show. That's it. Great show no doubt, but I'm not having very much fun. I just spent all my time at home playing WoW pretty much.

I can't even say everything I want to say about why I don't go out because of some of the ppl who will read this. What I will say is that the last time I went out with a group of people, I felt like I wasn't really there at all and no one cared. That was before Mega just for clarity. I was so out of the loop on everything they were all talking about that there wasn't any place for me to jump in. I had to leave early and walk a few blocks along the empty street at like 2am to get back to my car and no even offered to go with me. I either would have said that it wasn't needed or been glad to drop the person off again with the rest of group before heading home...

I've lost all but a couple of my friends, and even those I hardly see anymore.

I don't know where to begin to get them back.



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